(We see TGWTRS wearing a Sherlock Holmes costume, smoking a pipe, speaking in a British accent as the opening from Sherlock Holmes by Hans Zimmer plays in the background)
TGWTRS: Hello, I'm Detective Guy With the Red Shirt. Because I have nothing else to do anyway.
(Slideshow of Sherlock Holmes pictures plays)
TGWTRS: (voiceover) What do you say about Sherlock Holmes? He was one of the greatest detectives of all time.
(Shows picture of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle)
TGWTRS: (voiceover) He was created by Scottish author and physician Sir Arthur Conan Doyle.
(Slideshow of Sherlock Holmes pictures continues)
TGWTRS: (voiceover) The fantastic London-based "consulting detective", Holmes is famous for his astute logical reasoning, his ability to adopt almost any disguise, and his use of forensic science skills to solve difficult cases.
(Random footage of films)
TGWTRS: (voiceover) There were movies about him during the 20th Century. And the only famous actor who plays Sherlock Holmes was none other than the late Basil Rathbone.
(Footage of Sherlock Holmes 2009)
TGWTRS: (voiceover) Until Robert Downey, Jr. from Iron Man bit the dust.
(Cut to Guy)
TGWTRS: There is a certain combination: Sherlock Holmes and Disney. If you combine them together, what do you get? None other than The Great Mouse Detective.
(Footage from The Great Mouse Detective)
TGWTRS: (voiceover) The 26th animated feature in the official canon, the film was directed by Burny Mattinson, David Michener, and the team of John Musker and Ron Clements, who later directed Disney's hit films The Little Mermaid, Aladdin, and The Princess and the Frog. The film was also known as The Adventures of the Great Mouse Detective for its 1992 theatrical re-release and Basil the Great Mouse Detective in some countries. The main characters are all mice and rats living in Victorian London.
(Shows book cover of Basil of Baker Street by Eve Titus.)
TGWTRS: (voiceover) Based on the children's book series Basil of Baker Street by Eve Titus, it draws heavily on the tradition of Sherlock Holmes with a heroic mouse who consciously emulates the detective. Interestingly, Sherlock Holmes also mentions "Basil" as one of his aliases in the Arthur Conan Doyle story "The Adventure of Black Peter".
(Shows poster of The Black Cauldron)
TGWTRS: (voiceover) After the failure of the Disney animated feature film The Black Cauldron, this simpler film proved to be a success upon its initial release in 1986.
(Shows Walt Disney Pictures logo)
TGWTRS: (voiceover) As such, the new senior management of the company were convinced that their animation department was still a viable enterprise and this set the stage for the Disney Renaissance.
TGWTRS: So, let's dive into The Great Mouse Detective.
(The film begins)
TGWTRS: (voiceover) The movie begins in London in the year 1897. Because every Sherlock movie has that setting in 1890s. Anyway we see Olivia's father are celebrating her birthday at a tiny shop called Flaversham's Toys. I don't get the joke at all.
Olivia: You know, Daddy, this is my very best birthday.
Flaversham: Ahh... but I haven't given you your present yet.
Olivia: (excited) What is it? What is it?
Flaversham: Now, now. Close your eyes. (He moves to a small cupboard as Olivia tries to sneak a peek between her fingers) Uh-uh-uh-uh. Auch, no. No peeking now.
TGWTRS: Does that voice sound familiar?
(Shows picture of Scrooge McDuck from DuckTales)
TGWTRS: (voiceover) Never mind.
(Back to the movie)
(Olivia giggles as Flaversham returns to the table, a small toy in his hand that resembles a flowerbud. He winds the key and sets it in front of her. As a gentle tune plays, Olivia opens her eyes and sees that the bud has turned into a mouse ballerina, who dances for her.)
TGWTRS: Wow, a toy made by Flaversham, ready to compete with Zhu Zhu pets.
But sadly, this tender moment doesn't last long.
The locked door begins to rattle. Olivia and Flaversham look towards the door as the rattling becomes more intense.
Chucky: (voiceover) Open the god damn door!
Flaversham puts his arms around his daughter protectively.
Olivia Who is that?
Flaversham I-I don't know! Quickly, dear, stay in here and don't come out!
Flaversham hides her in the cupboard and stands in front of it, just as Fidget the bat bursts in though the window.
TGWTRS: (reacted to scene) Holy shit! I haven't experience a jump scare since Piranha 3D.
TGWTRS: (voiceover) So anyway, after a scene of nightmare fuel, Olivia is all alone.
(Olivia goes to the window, calling out to Flaversham)
Olivia: Daddy! Daddy!
As Olivia's cries echo in the night, the camera zooms out into the clouds.
TGWTRS: Well, that was subtle.
TGWTRS: (voiceover) Anyway, after the opening credits, we introduce to Dr. David Q. Dawson, most recently of the Queen's 66th Regiment in Afghanistan. Jesus, I hope he doesn't have PTSD after 9/11.
(Footage of September 11)
TGWTRS: (voiceover) Can you tell me when this scene looks... I don't know. Tear-jerking.
(As Dawson walks through an alleyway, he pauses. From inside a forgotten rainboot, he can hear someone crying. He walks over to the shoe and sees Olivia sitting on a medicine box crying softly.)
Dawson Oh! Oh my! Are you all right, my dear? (Olivia turns to him. Dawson removes a hankerchief from his jacket pocket and hands it to her) Come now, come, come. Here, dry your eyes. (Olivia takes the hankerchief and blows her nose. She gives it back to Dawson and he puts it back in his pocket, taking a seat beside her) Ah, yes, that's better. Now tell me, what's troubling you, my dear?
Olivia I... I'm lost. I-I-I'm trying to find Basil of Baker Street.
She hands him a small newspaper clipping.
Dawson Now, let me see here... (Dawson puts his bifocals on and reads the headline) "Famous detective solves baffling disappearance." Mmm, hmmm. But where are your mother and father?
Olivia (getting upset) That's why I m-m-must find Basil! (She begins to sob into her scarf)
Dawson (Trying to calm her) There, there, there. Now, now, now. Well I don't know any Basil. (Olivia looks at him sadly, but then he gives her a warm smile) But I do remember where Baker street is. (Her face brightens a bit as Dawson reopens his umbrella) Now, come with me. We'll find this Basil chap together.
TGWTRS: God. Damn. That was so tear-jerking, maybe Fievel should have this situation.
TGWTRS: (voiceover) So, Olivia and Dawson arrived at Baker Street. Make sure Robert Downey Jr. wasn't in this movie.
Dawson knocks, and Mrs. Judson, the housekeeper, opens the door, her arms full of books, blankets and pillows, as well as a teacup and medieval mace.
Dawson: (Removes his hat) Good evening, Madam. Is this the residence of Basil of Baker Street?
Mrs. Judson: I'm afraid it is. He's not here at the moment, but you're welcome to come in and wait.
TGWTRS: (as Mrs. Judson) If you see Jude Law, tell him I said "Hi!" while I'm speaking in an Angela Lansbury accent.
TGWTRS: (voiceover) So anyway, we introduce to Basil of Baker--
(the door bursts open to reveal a large mouse dressed in Chinese robes. He smiles triumphantly with a gun in his hand as lightning strikes. Dawson is petrified as the mouse bursts inside, rushing towards one of the many tables)
TGWTRS: (confused) Fu Manchu?
(The mouse reaches up and pulls on what turns out to be a mask to reveal the one and only...)
Basil Basil of Baker Street, my good fellow.
TGWTRS: That's what I thought.
Basil Quite simple, really. (holds up Dawson's arm to reveal a stitch mark on his jacket) You've sewn your torn cuff together with the Lembert stitch, which of course, only a surgeon uses. (He continues speaking as he gathers several pillows) And the thread is a unique form of catgut distinguished by it's (leaning down to whisper to Olivia) peculiar pungency (she's confused) and found only in the Afghan provinces.
TGWTRS: Is he insane or what?
One by one, Basil tosses the three pillows at Dawson. Dawson holds them against his body, his face mostly covered.
Dawson (muffled) Amazing!
Basil Actually... it's elementary, my dear Dawson.
Basil spins the revolver and aims it at the pillows.
TGWTRS: DUDE! YOU'RE INSANE!
Dawson looks around in terror and throws the pillows onto an armchair. As Basil calmy readjusts his aim, Dawson jumps behind the opposite chair, siezing Olivia's arm and bringing her behind it. The gun fires, and pillow feathers fly as they cautiously peek out.
TGWTRS: (sigh of relief) I haven't seen someone that's insane since Twilight.
Mrs. Judson rushes back out.
Mrs Judson What in heaven's name? (distraught) Oh! Oh! My- (she spits out several feathers) my good pillows!
(Footage from Sherlock Holmes 2009)
[Mrs. Hudson notices the dog laying on the floor]
Mrs. Hudson: Oh, he's killed the dog. Again.
Dr. John Watson: [irritated] What have you done to Gladstone now?
Sherlock Holmes: I was simply testing a new anesthetic. He doesn't mind.
TGWTRS: (voiceover) So Basil matches the markings of the bullet he fired with another bullet. And it doesn't match.
(the markings go off in seperate dircetions)
Basil: Noo! Drat! (depressed) Another dead end.
TGWTRS: (as Basil) It doesn't matter. I hate Miss Judson's pillows anyway.
He flops into his chair and slowly reaches for the violin sitting beside him. As he plays, Dawson nudges Olivia encouragingly, and she walks towards him, determined to make him listen.
Olivia Now will you please listen to me? My daddy's gone and I'm all alone.
Basil (Pauses play) Young lady, this is a most inopportune time. (He resumes playing.)
TGWTRS: (as Basil) Maybe if I should play louder, maybe she'll leave me alone.
Basil: Surely your mother knows where he is.
Olivia I--- I don't have a mother.
(Basil screeches the violin as he abruptly sits up)
TGWTRS: Maybe her mother is killed. I don't know.
Olivia I didn't lose him. He was taken, by a bat.
(Basil's eyes widen and he leans towards Olivia intently)
Basil Did you say... bat?
Basil Did he have a crippled wing?
Olivia I don't know. But he had a peg leg!
TGWTRS: Make sure that bat doesn't have a credit card.
Basil (stands up on the arms of the chair, his arms wide) Ha!
Dawson I say, do you know him?
Basil (now sitting on the top of the chair) Know him? That bat, one Fidget by name, is in the employ of the fiend who was the very target of my experiment! The horror of my every waking moment. The nefarious Professor Ratigan!
Basil points his bow in the direction of the fireplace, where a picture of a well dressed rat sits on the mantle frame. The flames in the fire burst and lightning strikes as we see a close up of Ratigan's sinister grin.
(Footage from Phineas and Ferb)
Isabella: Now that was scary.
(Back to the movie)
TGWTRS: (voiceover) That's right. If Sherlock Holmes have Professor Moriarty, there is none other in the Great Mouse Detective than...
TGWTRS: (confused) Where did that dramatic chord comes from?
TGWTRS: (voiceover) Anyway, we head to a prison where Flaversham invents a mechanical robot for an evil scheme! And we introduce to Professor Ratigan, voiced by none other than the late and legendary... (Vincent Price accent) Vincent Price!
Ratigan We will have our device ready by tomorrow evening, won't we? You know what will happen if you... fail?
In Ratigan's hands is a small gold bell which obviously holds a certian threat.
TGWTRS: (voiceover) But Flaversham can't allow it.
Flaversham You can do what you want with me. I won't be a part of this... this... this evil any longer!
Ratigan has wiped the oil away breathes out his cigarette smoke. He smiles.
Ratigan Mmm... very well. if that is your decision. Oh, uh, by the way, I'm taking the liberty of having your daughter brought here. (He pick's up Olivia's ballerina doll and winds it up.)
Ratigan Yes. Hm hm, yes. (He sets the doll down and watches it dance) I would spend many a sleepless night if anything unfortunate were to befall her.
Flaversham You... You wouldn't!
Ratigan picks up the doll again, and squeezes it until it breaks. He gazes at the doll in mock sorrow.
TGWTRS: Ratigan. He breaks your toys.
Outside, Ratigan is humming to himself as he writes a list.
Ratigan Oh, I love it when I'm nasty.
TGWTRS: Indeed you are, Ratigan. Indeed you are.
TGWTRS: (voiceover) Anyway, Ratigan sends Fidget to steal some stuff listed on the list. That was so evil!
Inside, Ratigan is approaching his throne, being cheered by his men. He sits down and holds out his cigarette. Several hands offer lit matches, and he lights it and inhales, blowing out several smoke rings.
Ratigan My friends, we are about to embark on the most odious, the most evil, the most diabolical scheme of my illustrious career. A crime to top all crimes. A crime that will live in infamy!
Most of his men are cheering at this bit of news, save one mouse, Barthelomew, who's attention is focused on his empty mug. He holds it upside down and watches sadly as the last drop of beer falls to the floor.
Ratigan (holding up newspaper featuring the Queen's picture on the front page) Tomorrow evening, our beloved monarch celebrates her Diamond Jubilee (playing with his words) and... with the enthusiastic help of our good friend, Mr. Flaversham (his men chuckle) it promises to be a night she will never forget! (he burns her picture with his cigarette) Her last night... and my first as supreme ruler of all mousedom!
(Footage from Street Fighter the Movie)
M. Bison: Of course!
TGWTRS: Shut up!
TGWTRS: (voiceover) We now introduce to the first song in the movie...and it kicked ass!
(Ratigan sings The World's Greatest Criminal Mind)
TGWTRS: (voiceover) Now the only thing it kicked ass is the lyrics. Listen to them.
Ratigan twirls his cane around a rope and yanks on it, causing wine to pour out onto a fountian. Bartholemew's tail is wagging, and he tosses his empty glass over his shoulder, and rushes over to the fountian, drinking from one of the spouts.
Ratigan Now comes the real tour de force
Tricky and wicked, of course
My earlier crimes were fine for their times
But now that I'm at it again (he kicks Bartholemew into the fountian)
An even grimmer plot has been simmering
In my great criminal brain
TGWTRS: (voiceover) But this famous song is interrupted by Bartholomew who calls him the word that doesn't allow to be spoken in front of him.
Bartholemew To Ratigan, the world's greatest rat. (hic)
Ratigan spits out his wine in shock. His thugs gasp in terror.
(Footage from South Park Movie)
Mr. Garrison: What did you say?!
Ratigan (lifting up Bartholemew by his sweater) I am NOT A RAT!
TGWTRS: (voiceover) So Ratigan uses one secret weapon he posesses: (whispers) the bell.
Ratigan pulls out the bell from his vest pocket. He rings it, and his men gasp in terror as they look to the alleyway, where a shadow is approaching. An enormously fat cat is approaching the oblivious Bartholemew.
TGWTRS: Any last words, Bartholomew.
Bartholemew Oh, Ratigan
You're the tops and that's that.
(hic) Oh dear.
TGWTRS: Of course.
The cat has picked up Bartholemew and all we see is the shadow of the mouse hovering over the cat's open jaws. Ratigans men are cowering in the doorway as Ratigan himself is enjoying a cigarette.
Bartholemew To Ratigan, the world's greatest-
A gulping noice is heard along with the cat's content meow. Two of the thugs remove thier hats and the third wipes a tear from his eye.
TGWTRS: Let's give a moment of silence to that pointless character.
(Caption appears on screen.....R.I.P. Bartholomew: I don't know when he was born, but he died in 1897.; the theme of "Titanic" plays)
(Ratigan looks a little dismayed, but he recovers and struts back towards his terrified men)
Ratigan I trust there will be no further interruptions? (he clears his throat and wraps his arms around his men.) And now, as you were singing?
Singing is clearly the last thing they have on their minds as they huddle close together. But as Ratigan flashes the bell, they get their insperation back.
Thugs Even louder
We'll shout it!
No one can doubt what we know you can do.
Several of his thugs are now rushing towards him, handing him a robe, a crown, and a diamond topped scepter.
TGWTRS: (voiceover) Oh yeah! Fuck Scar from Lion King! He's the ultimate bad guy from Disney!
(Cut to Basil beginning to pace as Olivia follows him.)
Basil Hmm. Ratigan's up to something. A crime of the most sinister nature no doubt. The question is, what would he want with a toy maker?
TGWTRS: Maybe he wants to establish a toy company.
Olivia has stopped by the window. Fidget pops down from above as lightining strikes, scaring Olivia. She screams, and Basil turns just in time to see Fidget drop. He rushes to the door.
TGWTRS: (scared again) Holy shit! Twice!
Basil Quickly Dawson, we've not a moment to lose!
Dawson Uh, uh I'm right behind you, Basil.
(They rush outside, but Fidget is already gone. Basil looks around and kneels down to look at the sidewalk, where Fidget has left behind his muddy footprints.)
Dawson No sign of the blackguard anywhere.
Basil Not quite, Dawson. He left some rather unusual footprints. They obviously belong to the same fiend who abducted the girl's father. Ratigan's peg-legged lackey.
Dawson (Upon finding Fidget's hat) Uh... Basil?
Basil (he takes the hat) Ah-ha! Excellent work, old man. Ha, ha, ha!
TGWTRS: (deep voice) EPIC CONVENIENCE!!!
TGWTRS: (voiceover) So anyway, after suffering nightmare fuel...again, it looks like the game's afoot!
Olivia Wait for me! I'm coming too!
As she rushes to join them, she seizes her hat and scarf, knocking over Basil's violin in the process. He dives down to catch it.
Basil What? Certainly not! This is no business for children. (sets the violin back on the chair)
Olivia Are we going to take a cab?
Basil sighs and puts his hand on his forehead as Olivia puts several crumpets into her pocket.
Basil Oh...(he takes her hand and makes her face him) my dear, I don't think you understand. It will be quite dangerous. (he sits on his violin, breaking it in half.)
(Footage from Three Stooges short)
[Curly tosses sack of flour down. Moe is forced to drop the eggs to catch the flour]
Larry: Ya nitwit, now you broke the eggs!
[Newly hatched chicks are walking around the broken eggs]
Curly: So what? We'll have steak smothered in lamb chops... and maybe chicken on the side! Nyuk nyuk nyuk.
Larry: Well, you fix it, I've got some prospecting to do. Hand me down that dynamite, and be careful!
Curly: I'll handle it as if it were eggs!... I mean, I'll be careful!
(Back to the movie)
(Basil grunts and pulls the ruined instrument out.)
Basil Why you- Look at- (Basil takes a deep breath, trying to control his rage) young lady, you are most definitely not accompanying us. And that is final!
TGWTRS: (as Basil) But you're coming with us anyway! (confused) What did I just say?
TGWTRS: So, Basil, Dawson, and Olivia sneaks into Holmes' flat.
(voiceovers from Sherlock Holmes 2009 plays in the background)
Sherlock Holmes: Good afternoon, dear.
Dr. John Watson: Get on with it, Holmes.
Sherlock Holmes: Well, cleverly concealed in the hangman's knot was a hook... oh, my, I think my legs have fallen asleep. I should probably come down.
Mary Morstan: John, shouldn't we help him down?
Dr. John Watson: No, no, I hate to cut him off mid-stream. Carry on.
Basil Toby? Toby?
Olivia (tugs on Dawson's coat and whispers) Who is Toby?
Dawson Well my dear, Toby is... well, he's uh, uh... (Olivia waits for an answer as Dawson turns to Basil) I say Basil, who is this Toby chap?
Before Basil answers, thundering footsteps appoach. Towering over them is an adorable basset hound puppy, who is obviously very happy to see Basil.
Basil Ahh! Here he is now! (He pushes Dawson forward as Toby leans down.) Dawson... Toby.
Dawson (nervously tipping his hat and patting Toby's nose) Charmed, I'm sure.
TGWTRS: I thought he was shot. What is he? The reincarnation of Jesus?
Basil: Your father is as good as found. (He hooks on Toby's leash.) Toby... (Toby strikes a 'pointer' pose) Sic 'em!
As Toby rushes out, he accidently stomps on Basil. The dazed detective manages to hold on to the leash and quickly regains his wind.
TGWTRS: (voiceover) So, the game is afoot? I don't know. You be the judge. So anyway, we cut to Random Stuff-R-Us where Fidget is inside, stealing stuff for Ratigan's *evil* scheme.
Fidget (reading from Ratigan's list and checking it along as he goes) Get the following. Tools, check. I got tools. Gears, double check. I got gears. Girl, (he makes a check and then erases it) No, didn't get girl. Uniforms, (chuckles) I got plently uniforms!
TGWTRS: (as Fidget) I'm getting paid for this. Right?
Basil hastily shushes him and climbs in, followed by Olivia, then Dawson. After getting inside, Dawson closes the window. Inside, they walk through the store. Dawson doesn't look where he's going and bumps into something.
Dawson Ooh! I beg your pardon, I-
Dawson stops when he sees what he hit was a huge doll.
TGWTRS: (scared again) HOLY-- Wait. That wasn't scary.
Dawson Oh my. Upon my word I've never seen so many toys.
Basil (Darting out from behind the doll's leg) Behind any of which could lurk a bloodthirsty assassin. So please, Doctor, be very careful.
TGWTRS: (as Basil) Make sure you don't bump into Chucky, because he's armed!
From above, Fidget watches the trio move across a chessboard. Basil pauses by the rook.
Basil Hmm. (pushes the rook over one space) Checkmate. Ah-ha! (Basil holds his magnifying glass to his eye, staring at Fidget's footprints) Evidence of our peg-legged adversary.
TGWTRS: Worst. Joke. Ever.
Fidget's eyes widen, and he darts away, leaving the list behind.
(Footage from Austin Powers)
Dr. Evil: Why must I be surrounded by frickin' idiots?
TGWTRS: (voiceover) Anyway, after Fidget fails Henchmen 101, Dawson founds the list. When suddenly...
(Suddenly music boxes are playing, and winding toys are moving along the shelves. A puppy pokes it's head out of a hat and barks. A bunny is moving an egg shell up and down as a baby chick chirps inside. It rolls by a fiddle player and a carousel. Nearly every toy in the shop is operating on it's own. Olivia, seeing some bubbles, follows them, separating herself from Dawson and Basil. A small Dumbo toy is the source of the bubbles, and there is a mouse-sized baby carraige that is slowly rocking back and forth. Olivia approaches it, and as she reaches up to pull the blanket back, Fidget lunges at her, a bonnet on his head. In the other room, Basil and Dawson hear her terrifed scream.)
Fidget (throwing her in the bag) Gotcha!
Basil (rushing ahead) Quickly Doctor!
TGWTRS: You should have PROTECTED HER FROM DANGER, YOU IDIOTS!
TGWTRS: (voiceover) Anyway, after Fidget disappears, just Basil's luck, they have the evidence they need to hunt down Ratigan and stop him once and for all.
TGWTRS: I never knew that Carmen Sandiego was the world's greatest criminal mind. Is she?
TGWTRS: (voiceover) Back at Ratigan's lair, Flaversham is forced to work on the robot so it could be ready for tonight... (evil voice) or else!
Ratigan Ah, Mr. Flaversham. (Flaversham eyes him warily as Ratigan holds his cape dramaticaly) Allow me to present... (moves his cape to reveal Olivia in Fidget's grasp) your charming daughter.
Fidget keeps a tight hold on Olivia as she rushes towards Flaversham. Olivia stomps on his foot and runs to her father as Fidget hops up and down in pain.
Fidget Owww! My foot, my only foot!
TGWTRS: (as Fidget) I should have used my other one!
Ratigan Oh, how sweet. (Pretends to wipe at his eyes with his hankerchief) Oh I just love tearful reunions. (taking hold of Olivia) Now, come along, my dear.
Olivia Oh please! Please! (Reaches out to Flaversham as Fidget takes her away) Father!
Flaversham (Ratigan is holding him by his apron) Olivia! Oh please, professor!
Ratigan Now, now, Fidget will take good care of her. (threateningly) That is, as long as we have no further delays...
Flaversham (returning to the robot) Yes, yes, I-I'll finish it. Oh, just don't hurt my daughter.
Ratigan Remember, it must be ready... tonight. (slams the door)
TGWTRS: (as Ratigan) Or I'll feed you to my cat!
Ratigan Where is the list?
Fidget (getting nervous) The list, yeah, yeah, yeah. Well you see, uh, it was like this. I was in the toy store getting uniforms when I heard, A-roo A-roo...
TGWTRS: (as Ratigan) Stop it, Fidget. Everyone knows you suck at playing charades!
Fidget (on his knees, panting like a dog) A dog came. I ran. I had baby bonnet, girl in bag and Basil chased me.
Ratigan What? Basil on the case! Why you gibbering little...
Fidget cowers as Ratigan clutches his chest, apparently having a heart attack. His face is red with fury, but just as quickly as his temper rose, it fades again, and he scoops Fidget into his arms.
Ratigan (chuckles) Oh, my dear Fidget. You have been hanging upside down too long.
Ratigan carries Fidget to the back.
Fidget You mean, you're not mad? I'm glad you're taking it so well.
TGWTRS: So, what do you think what happens next?
There is silence until we hear the sound of a bell, and Fidget's terrified scream.
TGWTRS: Of course.
Ratigan Oh I can just see that insufferable grin on his smug face. (he bangs his head against the bottle and winces in pain, but suddenly has a wicked idea) Yes... Yes, I can just see it. (chuckles) Felicia, release him.
Fidget I'm to young to die!
Felicia pouts for a moment, then spits the poor mangled bat out.
Ratigan (holding him up by his cheeks) Fidget, you delightful little maniac. You've presented me with a singular opportunity. (drops Fidget, feigning a look of concern) Poor Basil! (deviously) Oh, he is in for a little surprise.
TGWTRS: Poetry. Sheer poetry.
TGWTRS: (voiceover) We cut to Basil's flat where he investigates the list.
Basil Offhand, I can deduce very little. Only that the words are written with a broad pointed quill pen which has spattered, twice. That the paper is of (tosses it in his hand, testing the weight) native Mongolian manufacture, no water mark. And has (he puts it to his lips and smacks it several times) been gummed, if I'm not very much in error.
TGWTRS: Uh, Basil, do you know where it's been?
TGWTRS: (voiceover) So, Basil takes the list, lighting it on fire, puts the ashen remains into a bowl, ground it up with a with a small wooden masher, pours the contents onto a glass jar of a yellow chemical, which turns blue, sets the jar below a glass spout and reaches to the other side of the chemistry set to turn on a small flame, bubbles up and slowly makes it's way through the tubes, and dropping it into the other beaker, making the chemical turn red.
TGWTRS: So, what is the secret compound?
Dawson Salt water? Great Scott.
TGWTRS: No shit.
Basil (rumaging through his maps) It proves beyond a doubt, this list came from the riverfront area. (uses his darts to pin the map to the wall)
Dawson Ah, now steady on there, Basil.
Basil No, no. Elementary my dear Dawson. We merely look for a seedy pub at the only spot (Basil marks said spot with another dart) where the sewer connects to the waterfront.
(Footage from Star Wars IV)
Obi-Wan: You will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy. We must be cautious.
(Back to the movie)
TGWTRS: (voiceover) So, Basil and Dawson went there, disguised as henchmen, which looks like Popeye the Sailor rejects.
(Basil opens the door. It certianly is a seedy pub, where clearly every lowlife in London has gathered. The mice are all smoking, playing poker, or drinking at the bar. Some are even passed out from the amount of alchohol they've drunk.)
TGWTRS: (voiceover) That's what Disney like: smoking, drinking, and gambling. Perfectly inappropriate for kids movies. Are they?
Basil Two pints for me and my shipmate. Oh, by the way. We just got into port. We're looking for an old friend of mine. Maybe you know him. Goes by the name of Ratigan!
At the mention of Ratigan's name, the barmaid gasps, as well as several poker players and the pianist. They stare at Basil in shock as the barmaid recovers from her shock.
Barmaid I... never heard of him.
TGWTRS: (as Barmaid) I'm trying to be suspicious while speaking in an Angela Lansbury accent. Pretend I didn't say anything!
As a knife strikes the piano, the pianist nervously begins the third act. The patrons are already armed with chairs, darts, and one with an ax, ready to throw them at whoever is next. But when the curtians open, a pretty lady mouse stands onstage, wearing a blue tank top, purple skirt, and pink shawl. The patrons slowly lower their weapons as she begins to sing to them.
TGWTRS: Okay, let me ask you a question:
(shows picture of the patrons, already armed with chairs, darts, and one with an ax, ready to throw them at whoever is next)
TGWTRS: (voiceover) Why would they allow axes at a bar?!
TGWTRS: Jesus! Someone's going to get hurt! Imagine that they do it in real life.
TGWTRS: (as Drunken Patron) I would like another beer!
TGWTRS: (as Bartender) Uh, sir, I think you have quite enough for today.
TGWTRS: (as Drunken Patron; threatening Bartender with an axe) Give me another beer or I'll chop you!
TGWTRS: (as Bartender; with fear) Okay! Okay!
As the beat picks up, she begins to strut onstage as every eye is focused on her, bouncing along with her song. Dawson looks as though he's fallen in love.
Miss Kitty Hey fellas
The time is right
Tonight's the night
Boys, what you're hopin' for will come true
Let me be good to you
TGWTRS: (voiceover) Well, it looks promising, but it was completely pointless.
TGWTRS: At least nothing sexy is about to happen that makes me change my--
The curtians pull back, and Miss Kitty is joined by two other twin lady mice, in pink hats, dresses and black elbow length gloves. Miss Kitty herself has put on black gloves, gotten rid of her shawl, and rips off her skirt, revealing her garter and feather boa around her waist. The patrons whistle, and one is trying to climb onstage.
Miss Kitty Hey fellas
I'll take off all my blues
A bomb goes off behind an ecstatic TGWTRS.
(Back to the movie)
TGWTRS: (voiceover) Disney: the company that brought you beastiality. During the performance, Basil sees the barmaid whisper something into the bartenders ear, who discreatly pours the contents of a vial into two mugs of beer.
(The barmaid has returned to Basil and Dawson's table, and hands them their drinks.)
Barmaid There you are, boys. It's uh... on the house.
Dawson I say, how very generous.
Basil Dawson... (Basil swirls his finger in the beer and takes a small taste) these drinks have been...
Unfortunatly, Dawson has already drained his beer.
Dawson (drunkenyl) Has a rather nice bite to it.
TGWTRS: Gee, at least it wasn't poison.
TGWTRS: (voiceover) So there, we see Fidget at the same bar they went to. They try to catch him, but then... this happens...
Basil: Dawson, ooh hoo, what luck! (he turns and sees Dawson is gone) Dawson? (looks to the stage in shock) Dawson!
Dawson has joined the showgirl's dance. Miss Kitty takes his arm and swings him around, and he rejoins the twins. Basil slaps his forehead and drags his hand down his face.
Miss Kitty Your baby's gonna come through
Let me be good to you
The twins each give Dawson a kiss on the cheek. He giggles, then drunkenly twirls right of stage and onto the piano.
Miss Kitty (striking one final pose) Yeah!
(Footage from Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides)
Scrum: I'm in love!
(Back to the movie)
TGWTRS: (voiceover) But that doesn't end well, when a bar fight erupts!
Basil Dawson? Dawson!
Dawson (the drug has worn off) What? What? (seeing the fight) What in heaven's name is going on?
Basil I've spotted our peg-legged- (Basil looks to the bar, but Fidget is gone. Basil helps Dawson to his feet) Come on, old fella. There's not a moment to lose.
TGWTRS: (as Basil) And I never knew that you were hanging around with mouse prostitutes. (normal voice) At least Artimus Gordon doesn't kiss him.
(Footage of Wild Wild West where Gordon is dressed as a prostitute)
TGWTRS: Or maybe...this.
(Footage of Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows where Downey Jr. is dressed as a woman)
Sherlock Holmes: I agree it's not my best disguise.
TGWTRS looks disgusted.
TGWTRS: (voiceover) So Basil and Dawson follow the bat's trail.
Basil and Dawson look into the pipe, seeing Fidget dissappear into the darkness.
Basil (shushes him and climbes insided) Follow me.
TGWTRS: Well, at least nothing bad happens, right?
Dawson (whispering as he knocks on the glass) Olivia?
Fidget, as it turns out, was in the bottle, dressed in Olivia's clothing. He turns to them, with a sinister smile as he make a kissy face.
TGWTRS: Just as I thought. Play it.
(Footage from Return of the Jedi)
Admiral Ackbar: It's a trap!
TGWTRS: (voiceover) So the thugs throw him a surprise party. I don't get it.
Balloons are released and confettii flies as Ratigan's thugs clap and cheer mockingly for our heroes. Ratigan stands at the doorway, appaulding.
Ratigan Bravo! Bravo! A marvelous performance.
TGWTRS: (as Ratigan) You've just won the "I Can't Believe I Fell For It!" Award!
Ratigan By the way Basil, I just love your disguise. (he rips off Basil's mustache and his thugs laugh as Ratigan inspects his hat) Really, one would hardly recognize you. The greatest (nudges Basil and starts to laugh) detective (leaning over him) in all mousedom!
Ratigan laughs even harder as he walks away. Basil is seething.
Basil Ratigan, so help me... I'll see you behind bars yet!
TGWTRS: (as Ratigan) But I'll be back in the sequel!
TGWTRS: (voiceover) So, Basil steeles himself against the jeering and pointing, but after a few moments, slumps, defeated and broken, which results in Ratigan's thugs tying Basil and Dawson to a mousetrap for their doom.
Ratigan You don't know what a delightful dilemma it was trying to decide on the most appropiate method for your demise.
Fidget nervously sets the switch and scampers away. Dawson flinches as the bonebreaking metal vibrates slightly. Basil is looking kinda catatonic, and is simply staring off into space.
Ratigan Oh, I had so many ingenious ideas I didn't know which to choose. So, I decided to use them all.
Ratigan gives a grand gesture to reveal a gun, a crossbow, an axe, and an anvil, all of which are aimed directily at Basil and Dawson.
TGWTRS: Rube Goldberg, eat your heart out.
(Cut to poorly drawn grave of Rube Goldberg, which shakes)
Rube Goldberg: Ooh! Why wouldn't I think of that.
(Back to the movie)
Ratigan Marvellous, isn't it? Oh ho... But here, let me show you how it works. Picture this. (Fidget, via Vanna White, gestures to the record player as Ratigan explains his dastardly death trap) First, a tune I've recorded especially for you. As the song plays the cord tightens and when the song ends, (we see that the cord is moving upward, tied to a cork which is supporting a wine glass with a metal ball inside) the metal ball is released. (a slide construceted of wood and pipes is aimed directly at the mousetrap trigger release) rolling along its merry way until.... (here as Ratigan speakes, he gestures to each individual weapon, starting with the mousetrap....) Snap! (the gun) Boom! (the crossbow) Twang! (the axe) Thunk! (and the anvil) Splat!
(Footage of Goldfinger)
James Bond: Do you expect me to talk?
Auric Goldfinger: No, Mr. Bond. I expect you to die.
(Back to the movie)
Ratigan (Dawson eyes him) Now, you will remember to smile for the camera, won't you? (a camera is indeed set up, ready to shoot) Hmm? Say 'cheese'.
Dawson You fiend!
Ratigan (starting the record) Sorry chubby. You should have chosen your friends more carefully.
TGWTRS: At least Dawson doesn't call him a rat.
TGWTRS: (ofscreen; as Dawson) You evil rat!
TGWTRS: Shut up!
TGWTRS: (voiceover) As they await for death, looks like something's wrong with his deathtrap.
Dawson suddenly looks over to the record, which is skipping. Over Ratigan's continued 'So long' Dawson continues to try and knock some sense into Basil.
Dawson Basil! The record!
Basil Oh, it's finally happened! I've been outwitted!
Dawson Oh, Basil, please!
Basil Beaten! Duped! Made a fool of! (Dawson's getting angry) Oh, ridiculed! Belittled!
Dawson That's enough!
The record fixes itself, and the song continues.
Homer Simpson: (voiceover) D'oh!
TGWTRS: (voiceover) We cut to Buckingham Palace where... Surprise, surprise! Ratigan captures her!
TGWTRS: So, what is the verdict?
(Footage of Casino Royale)
M: Christ, I miss the Cold War.
TGWTRS: Thank you.
TGWTRS: So anyway, time is running out for our doomed heroes.
Dawson The Queen's in danger, Olivia's counting on us. We're about to be horribly 'splatted' and all you can do is lie there feeling sorry for yourself. Well, I know you can save us. But if you've given up then why don't we set it off now and be done with it?
Basil (gives a weak chuckle.) "Set it off now." (is struck with an idea) Set it... off... now? Ye...Yeah! (laughs) Yes! We'll... We'll set the trap off now!
Basil grins maniacally, but Dawson is horrified.
TGWTRS: Well, that's official. He's insane.
(Shows images in chronological order)
TGWTRS: (voiceover) So, let me tell you what happens next: Basil and Dawson hit the trigger, saved from the metal switch by the ball that was stopped just between their heads. The vibration loosens one of the pegs, which ricochets towards the gun, causing it to misfire and hit the crossbow, which instead of being aimed at Basil and Dawson, flies towards the axe, cutting off the head. The blade falls lenghtwise, slicing through the ropes and trap, effectivly freeing them. The anvil falls seconds later, missing them both. The force of the anvil hitting the ground rattles Olivia's bottle, loosening the cork and sending her sailing through the air. As Dawson leans heavily against the anvil, Basil sheds his sailor costume and puts his deerstalker cap back on. He puts one arm around Dawson and holds the other out in the air. Give him an A for creativity.
Basil Thank you, Dawson. (Olivia lands right in Basil's open arm, and he brings the two of them close) Smile everyone!
The camera goes off, capturing Basil's brilliant smile, and Olivia and Dawson's stunned expressions.
TGWTRS: Gee. I wish they use that for a postcard.
Postcard: Happy Birthday, Ratigan. We escape your deathtrap that made Harry Houdini blush. Now, we're going to stop your evil scheme once and for all. Signed, Basil. P.S. You're nothing but slimy contemptible SEWER RAT!
TGWTRS: (voiceover) Meanwhile, at the palace, Ratigan's thugs are playing the trumpets to announce the queen's entrance. The crowd is fooled by the Robot Queen as it steps out.
Robot Queen On this most august occasion we are gathered here not only to commemorate my 60 years as Queen but to honor one-
(Ratigan watches from behind the curtian as Flaversham's voice takes over. A rifle is pointed at his back as one of the thugs is holding notecards for Flaversham to read.)
Flaversham Of truly noble stature. I present to you a statesman among mice. A gifted leader.
Robot Queen A crusader for justice!
TGWTRS: (as Robot Queen) A person who's responsible for helping Nazis kill 6 million Jews during the Holocaust!
(A subtitle, DON'T KILL ME FOR INSULTING JEWISH PEOPLE! BLAME MEL GIBSON! HE'S RACIST! appears on the bottom)
Robot Queen A majestic mountain of humility. And my new Royal Consort. Professor Ratigan!
The crowd backs away, horrified as Ratigan bursts out, wearing a crown and purple robe decorated with medals. A child blows a rasberry at him, and his mother quickly covers his mouth.
TGWTRS: (as Mother) Quiet, or he'll massacre you!
Ratigan Item 96 (snickers) A heavy tax shall be levied against all parasites and sponges. Such as the elderly, the infirm and especially (snickers) little children.
Ratigan leans upside down over the railing to sneer at the boy from before. He looks at him defiantly before his mother whisks him away. An old man with a cast and crutch approaches him angrily.
Old Man That's ridiculous. You're insane.
TGWTRS: (as Ratigan) Kill him. (Cat scream along with a Wilhelm scream is heard)
Ratigan That is of course with your Highness' permission.
There is no answer right away, and Ratigan gives it a light slap, making it spring back to life.
Robot Queen Most assuredly... (it glares at him) you insidious fiend.
Robot Queen You're not my Royal Consort!
Ratigan (covering it's mouth and addressing the crowd) What a sense of humor.
Robot Queen (ducks down to free itself) You're a cheap fraud and impostor.
Ratigan (under his breath) Flaversham!
As Ratigan smiles nervously at the crowd, we see that behind the curtian, it is now Basil at the controls. Olivia and Flaversham are embracing as Dawson holds a rope around Ratigan's thugs. The Queen has her rope around Fidget, and gives it a tight tug.
Basil A corrupt, vicious, demented, scoundrel. There's not evil scheme you wouldn't concoct.
Basil jerks at the controls, causing the robot's head to fly up and spin, biting Ratigan's nose. He forces the head back down, but both arms spring out, hiting him in the stomach. Ratigan moves in front of the robot, hiding it from the crowd's eyes, but they aren't buying his scheme anymore.
Robot Queen (pushing past Ratigan) No depravity you wouldn't commit.
Ratigan tries to force his weight on the robot, but it springs upward, bringing him up with it, then letting him fall.
Basil You Professor-
Basil jerks even harder on the controls. Outside, the robot is falling apart.
Robot Queen are none other than a foul stenchus rodentus, commonly known as a
Ratigan's temper flares as he seizes the robot by the neck.
Ratigan DON'T SAY IT!
Basil (bursts from behind the curtian and points) Sewer rat!
Ratigan screams and arches his back.
(Footage of Monty Python and the Holy Grail when the Knights who say "Ni" are screaming and covering their ears at the same time)
TALL KNIGHT: Stop saying the word!
OTHER KNIGHTS: Stop saying the word! The word we cannot hear! The word ...
ARTHUR: (losing his patience with the fearful KNIGHTS OF 'NI') Oh, stop it!
[Terrific confusion amongst the KNIGHTS OF 'NI, they roll on the ground covering their ears. The TALL KNIGHT remains standing trying to control his MEN.]
(Back to the movie)
Basil Arrest that fiend!
TGWTRS: (voiceover) So anyway, as they are about to arrest him, Fidget kidnaps her again! Pay attention for crying out loud!
Flaversham turns, horrifed as Ratigan jumps from mouse to mouse, and grabs a robe to swing himself to the balcony. Basil, Dawson and Flaversham rush foward only to freeze as Ratigan holds Olivia threateningly over the edge.
Ratigan Stay where you are or the girl dies!
He dissappears behind the curtian, taking Olivia with him.
TGWTRS: (voiceover) So the chase is on when Basil chases Ratigan's dirigible with his own dirigible, made out of...
a British flag, a bunch of balloons, and a sliding match box?
TGWTRS: Okay. Now I'm confused.
Fidget stops, out of breath and exhausted. Ratigan glares at him as he hops inside and gestures towards Olivia
Fidget We have to lighten the load.
Ratigan Oh, you want to lighten the load!
Fidget snickers at Olivia, but Ratigan seizes him by the ears and tosses him over instead.
Ratigan Excellent idea!
Fidget No! Not me! I can't fly! I can't fly!
Fidget falls into the river Thames as Ratigan hops on the propeller and moves forward.
TGWTRS: Let us have a moment of silence for the death of Fidget. [Takes off his hat and bows his head before switching to another character]
TGWTRS/Other Guy: You know, I don't think that falling into the Thames river would've killed him
TGWTRS: Nah, he's dead.
Nostalgia Critic/Other Guy: [Beat] I mean, he knows how to swim
TGWTRS: No no, he's dead.
TGWTRS/Other Guy: [Beat] He could be injured for some other reason
TGWTRS: Why can't you just accept the INCREDIBLY RARE FACT that one of his henchmen has died in a Disney movie?!
TGWTRS/Other Guy: [Beat] That doesn't make any sense
TGWTRS: You racist?!
TGWTRS/Other Guy: How does that even?! [Gives up] Sure.
TGWTRS: (voiceover) But the chase suddenly rears its ugly head.
Ratigan can only scream himself as the dirigible smashes into the face of the giant clock.
TGWTRS: Okay. How could a tiny blimp smashes into the face of Big Ben?
(Shows picture of the Hindenburg made out of popsicle sticks.)
TGWTRS: (voiceover) It's like if the Hindenburg is made out of popsicle sticks! Good God, this is stupid!
(Back to the movie)
TGWTRS: (voiceover) Now we introduce to the ultimate showdown inside Big Ben. I have to admit: for 1986, it was the first Disney film to use computer generated imagery. Good for Disney.
Creeping up unnoticed behind him is Ratigan, his fist poised, ready to knock Basil down, the other hand clamped over Olivia's mouth.
(Footage of An American Tail: Fievel Goes West)
Wylie: Oh, look out behind you, kid!
Basil turns as Ratigan knocks him down. Basil rolls and catches the ends of the rotating gear, trying to pull himself back up as Ratigan prepares to deliver another blow. Olivia bites his hand, making Ratigan scream in pain, giving Basil the opportunity to climb up the gear and seize the professor's cape, and tangle it between two gears.
TGWTRS: That's what you get when you wear a cape as a villain.
(Footage of The Incredibles)
TGWTRS: (voiceover) Hell, even Syndrome could've learned better!
(Back to the movie)
Down below, Ratigan's face is filled with anger. As he watches the pair make their escape, his sanity snaps, and with a burst of strength, he tears his cape in half, freeing himself.
TGWTRS: (voiceover; as Ratigan) RATIGAN SMASH!
Basil and Olivia stop at the hole at the top of the tower, trapped.
TGWTRS: (voiceover) So, Ratigan is completely consumed. Gone is the egotistical gentleman. In his place is a terrifyingly dangerous monster as he's running through and around the many gears. You may wonder why his clothes are becoming torn and ragged.
Outside, Olivia is tugging on Basil's coat and pointing to Dawson and Flaversham, who are approaching. Ratigan is getting closer. Basil realizes this, and lifts Olivia into his arms, holding her up. Dawson his holding Flaversham by his apron as the toymaker is leaning forward as far as he can, trying to reach Olivia.
Basil Closer Dawson! Closer!
Ratigan leaps onto the striking hammer, nearly falling, but scrambles up and leaps forward.
TGWTRS: (voiceover; as Ratigan) I'm going to tear your ass up!
Basil is still trying to lift Olivia as high as he can, but Olivia and Flaversham can't quite make it.
Olivia Daddy, I can't reach! I can't reach!
Basil turns just in time to see Ratigan leap forward to tackle him. Basil grunts as Ratigan catches his midsection and the two topple downward. Olivia is tossed into the air, and caught by Flaversham before she falls. They hug, but down below Ratigan is still holding onto Basil. He tries to grasp the top of the tower, but between the rain and Ratigan's weight, he can't get a good grip. They seperate as they fall down the face of the clock. Midfall, Ratigan grabs Basil again, and they hit the hour hand. Basil is sent flying across and lands, his upper body laying over the edge. His vision blurred for only a second, he moves back. Ratigan is no where in sight as Dawson calls out to him, approaching the edge of the hand.
Dawson Basil! Over here!
Basil looks relieved, but is barely able to take a single step towards his friends when Ratigan attacks him from behind, lifting him up with one arm.
TGWTRS: Hello, nightmare fuel! (turns to audience) I know what you're thinking. (points to left) Hit it.
Basil manages to wriggle free and runs up towards the edge, but with frightening speed and agility, Ratigan is there, blocking his path.
(Mortal Kombat theme plays in the background as Basil and Ratigan battle to the death until Basil falls off the tower.)
Ratigan himself almost doesn't believe it, but a cruel smile spreads across his face as he leaps up and laughs maniacally.
Ratigan I won!
(However, his victory is cut short!)
Basil On the contrary!
Basil has managed to catch the propellor of the ruined dirigible, as well as something else of value for Ratigan.
Basil The game's not over yet! (rings the bell)
Ratigan only has time to check his pocket for his missing bell before the minute hand moves to ten o'clock. The striking hammer falls, and Big Ben sounds off. The vibrations force Ratigan over the edge and he falls. He makes one final grab at Basil, catching him by his jacket. The ropes snap under the extra weight. Ratigan falls as Basil clings to the propellor, which has snapped free. Olivia, Dawson and Flaversham are helpless as both Ratigan and Basil dissappear below the clouds.
(Footage of Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade)
Henry Jones, Sr.: Junior! (explosion is heard)
(Back to the movie)
Olivia turns to her father and begins to sob (as TGWTRS sheds a tear). A squeaking noise is approaching from below, and she leans back to look down. Basil is slowly making his way back up, pedaling with all his might as the propeller is lifting him higher. He hears his friends cheering and smiles.
Announcer: (speaks the following accompanying text, which is placed below Basil and heavenly music plays in the background) Basil will live.
(TGWTRS squeals for joy as he holds his arms up high)
(Back to the movie)
TGWTRS: (voiceover) So, Ratigan is defeated. Olivia and her father said "Goodbye" and they all live happily ever after.
TGWTRS: (closer to camera) OR DO THEY?!
Dawson opens the door and a young lady mouse is standing outside)
Lady Mouse I-is this the home of the famous Basil of Baker Street?
Dawson (taking off his hat) Indeed it is, Miss. (looks concerned) You look as if youre in some trouble.
Lady Mouse (crying and wiping at her eyes) Oh I am! I am!
Dawson Then, you've come to precisely the right place.
Basil (seizes the moment and puts his arm around Dawson) Ah, allow me to introduce my trusted associate, Dr. Dawson, with whom I do all my cases. Isn't that right, Doctor?
Dawson seems suprised at first, but then understands what Basil is asking him. They shake hands.
Dawson What? What? Oh, yes. Yes! By all means.
The sentitmental moment lingers for a bit, then Basil gets straight to buisness.
Basil As you can see Dawson this young lady has just arrived from the Hampstead district and is troubled about the disappearance of an emerald ring missing from the third finger of her right hand.
TGWTRS: (voiceover; as Basil) I wish there was going to be a sequel in the works. Because I'm going to be excited when that happens!
Outside Basil's window, Toby has an ear lifted, nodding along with Basil's conclusion. The camera zooms outward as Dr. Dawson concludes his narration.
Dawson From that time on, Basil and I were a close team. And over the years, we had many cases together. But I shall always look back on that first with the most fondness; my introduction to Basil of Baker Street, the Great Mouse Detective.
TGWTRS: And that's The Great Mouse Detective. Does it hold up? Yes.
(Footage from The Great Mouse Detective)
TGWTRS: (voiceover) The film was well-received by critics during its initial release, including a "two thumbs up" rating from critics Siskel and Ebert. The film also maintains a 80% "Fresh" rating on Rotten Tomatoes, based on 15 reviews.
This film did fairly well at the box office, garnering around $38,625,550 over a budget of $14 million during its initial release. Its moderate success after its predecessor's failure gave the new management of Disney confidence in the viability of their animation department. And let me tell you: this movie started the Disney Renaissance.
(Shows poster of The Little Mermaid)
TGWTRS: (voiceover) Take that, Ariel! Ha!
TGWTRS: You know what I'm going to say? Case closed. I'm Detective Guy with the Red Shirt. Because I have nothing else--
(Knock on the door)
(TGWTRS opens the door and a young woman in a Victorian dress is outside?
TGWTRS: Doctor, Miss Mary...
Sorry. Inspector Lestrade asks you come with me right away.
TGWTRS: What is it this time, Clarky?
It's one of our sergeants, sir. He went missing in the sewers the day, you reviewed this movie. I'm afraid the sewage workers found his body just this morning.
TGWTRS: (looks at audience) Well, case reopened.
(The review ends with a recreation of the end credits from Sherlock Holmes (2009) with footage of the Great Mouse Detective as the music from the end credits plays)
Written by Shawn Wooten
An American Tail: Fievel Goes West
Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery
Child's Play 2
The Great Mouse Detective
Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade
Monty Python and the Holy Grail
Phineas and Ferb
Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides
Random Three Stooges short
Return of the Jedi
September 11 footage (PLEASE DON'T KILL ME!)
Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows
South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut
Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope
Street Fighter: the Movie
Various footage of Sherlock Holmes movies (featuring Basil Rathbone)
Wild Wild West
SMW Studios tagline - Ratigan: Oh, I love it when I'm nasty.